Tag Archives: change

When people leave…

Today, my roommate of last two years left the flat.

Two years ago, in Oct. 2015, when I had come to see the room and set up things, one of the first questions I asked her was: So what do you like?

It was my attempt at striking a friendship, to understanding the person who I was going to live with in a city where I had never been to, and knew no one. Many days have passed since then, and as with any other relationship, we have had our fair share of agreements and disagreements.

The beautiful thing about people is, they adapt (or at least they try to/in some cases, pretend to). You put two grown people, from completely different backgrounds and upbringings together, and you see the magic happen. At first, we try to exert ourselves, be the people who we are, without paying too much attention to what the other person brings to the table. There come the disagreements, the fights. But then, when you know the situation is not going to change by itself, you learn to see the other’s point of view. It’s a diffusion process.

Over time, I grew used to her methods and processes. I slowly learnt to appreciate the amount of strength she showed by putting down her papers, finding a new job and a flat, all by herself. That’s what life is all about – people inspire you, and then you do impossible things. Subconsciously, I have taken some decisions which were, in many ways, a result of that diffusion process, and I feel proud that I have been able to take those decisions.

I will miss her, more importantly miss the in-depth conversations we used to have about other people. I like how I tried to understand people and the motivations behind their behavior.

Bangalore has made me immune to a lot of things. It has made me used to people leaving and being able to accept it no matter how hard it is. It has also taught me that the people we live with leave something of themselves in us, and that’s what I will cherish forever.

Here’s to a great future for her. And here’s hoping that I can keep the spirit of her alive in me that was the result of the diffusion process.

 

Throbbing in a Stone Cage

The calm morning light was seeping in through the sheer white curtains. She opened her eyes, slowly, hoping to see the familiar bookshelf, the computer table and the calendar and the clock on the wall.

None of the diffused familiarity met her myopic eye.┬áThe dominant colour in this room was white: the floor, the doors, the curtains, the bed-sheets. For a moment she thought she was inside a hospital. Then the train journey dawned on her mind – the endless green fields, the sparse, tall, grassy mountains, and the occasional railway station.

Her breathing stilled. Her body tensed. She felt as if her heart had been put inside a stone cage and it was throbbing for lack of space.

The tears threatened, but they’d have to wait. There were calls to make, assurances to give and way, way too many days to pass like this.

The count had only begun.