The Happiness Project | Day 6

Yesterday, I went with my friend Pooja to Phoenix mall. I have been to Phoenix mall multiple times, but it never fails to mesmerize me with its crowd. People there usually are so well-dressed and good-looking that in the beginning I used to get inferiority complex! No kidding!

Having stayed in Bangalore for about 2.5 years now and having reached sort of a financial security in my own life, the inferiority complex is gone. In fact, yesterday, looking at so many good-looking people actually inspired me.

Back in 2017, I used to hit the gym almost five days a week. It had become a great habit. However, 2018 took a bit of toll on me and somehow, I ended up stopping going to the gym. The thing with life is, it is not always a forward-looking journey. It is filled with loops – sometimes the loops take you forward, sometimes backward. Not always you are moving linearly towards your final goal. I feel growing up is about accepting this and not beating ourselves up on missing a set goal. There is a reason why new year resolutions do not work for the most part. Life takes a dig at you almost everyday, and to stay put to a fixed set of goals is difficult. Sometimes, the changing goals are not bad either, it means you are responding to the lemons life is throwing at you.

Nonetheless, yesterday, I was so excited that I thought I’d definitely go to the gym. I had already walked a lot yesterday, since we were at the mall for close to four hours. Besides that, I had gone to buy groceries as well, which is another half an hour of walk to and fro. Unfortunately, when I went to the gym, there was no light, none of the switches was working! I don’t know when this happened, but last time I checked, people used to hit the gym in the evenings on weekends.

Then I thought I’d go in the morning, between 8 to 9 today. I went to bed on time, around 11.45 PM, much earlier than my usual 1-2 AM. And guess what? The mosquitoes were so annoying that I was up close an hour in the morning around 5 AM. And then I finally got up from the bed at 10 AM! Another missed goal, there!

Anyway, I am not going to let this affect me. I will figure out some other form of exercise (there is a TT court at office, probably will put that to use). The idea is to get back to the usual scheme of things (by which I mean a healthy, happier lifestyle) by this weekend. I’ll keep you guys updated! 🙂

 

Welcome to a great summer morning!

Good morning, guys!

It’s a beautiful morning out here in Bangalore today. I am not sure if it rained last night – If it did, I slept through it. When I woke up in the morning, there was a chill in the air. There’s warm sunshine outside my window, and I can see the tree moving softly with a light breeze.

I have not been sleeping well for several weeks. Fortunately for me, I slept for two hours in the evening yesterday (post which I got up, made dinner, ate and cleaned the dishes) and then straight seven hours till this morning. Right now, I am well rested and very calm.

The weather outside just feels like an extension of what I feel inside – this happens only sometimes.

I love Bangalore on these days, even though I feel greatly nostalgic about Bengal in summer. Summers in Bengal have a unique flavor. Most days the sky will fill up with dirty grey clouds. They would bring, in their wake, gusty winds that would raise dust storms and bend the great trees over, sometimes even uprooting them. Then there would be the rains. The big drops lashing on the buildings, the trees, the grounds – creating puddles. The raindrops falling on tin ceilings and creating a great noise. The ambient music goes a notch higher as lightning adds its own beats.

Post the storm, there are the fallen leaves on the ground and mangoes that couldn’t survive the storm. We lived in the first floor throughout and don’t have the luxury of  owning mango trees in the courtyard. So, the mangoes that I am talking about belonged to those lucky neighbors who had the trees, and occasionally we had the chance of finding one lying on the ground after the storm. Sometimes, some of these kind-hearted neighbors would also come with a basket of the mangoes themselves, as gifts.

Summers in Bengal are beautiful! Even this morning, as I was speaking to my mother on the phone, I could hear a cuckoo singing. That one sound has the capacity to take me home, make me imagine how the trees are looking right now, how the roads are, the kids playing cricket on the ground, the soft colors of the afternoons after the sun has just taken leave for the day.

To be in sync with nature is perhaps the most beautiful thing in the world. I can imagine only one thing that can beat it. A good night’s sleep after you have had a tiring day and have not been able to sleep well in several weeks.

How’s the summer shaping up in your part of the world? Do let me know in the Comments section!

Love and peace,

Arpita

Non-NaNaWriMo Update

Hey folks!

Hopefully, you guys are doing well since we last met. Things are looking up at my side also. I am sorting through the priorities of life.

Priorities is a funny thing. It’s amazing how something that we hold important or exciting today is no longer important or exciting after some time. Back in 2015, when I had first started the blog, the one and only thing in my mind was to set up an author’s platform. My aim was to get published, as soon as possible, through traditional means. I focused less on college work and more on the book I was writing at the time. Once published, I would check the KDP Dashboard daily to see how I was doing on the sales front.

Almost 3 years later, my goals have changed again. My blog, to an extent, explains the shift in priorities.

Now, I am earning and almost on the verge of paying off the student loan that had been weighing on my mind ever since I went to college. I have also started investing money in mutual funds – which is another thing that is occupying my mind, because I am trying to understand how the money market works. Financial security is one of the biggest priorities for me right now.

Priorities have also shifted towards health. I would look at myself carefully in the mirror and take a mental note of losing inches from the waistline. I have started spending time on the treadmill and adopted healthier eating habits.

Some of my girl friends are getting married (the boys still have a bunch of years to roam free), so marriage also has come up in the list of priorities. I am still trying to understand what I expect out of relationships and how to find the person who I can spend the rest of my life with.

Besides that, for the first time in my life, I have an option to do the things the way I want to do, thanks to the financial security. I am no longer dependent on my parents for money. So, I want to give travelling a chance. I have been planning in my mind to go to Mumbai. My brother, who is studying in Kolkata, might end up visiting the city late December/early next year. If he comes, I might go visit him and the city for a weekend. I have never been, even though I have family in Mumbai. So I am really looking forward to it. I have also started planning a list of places that I want to visit on the trip. Let’s see!

NaNoWriMo, of course, has taken a backseat. I don’t have enough ideas to finish what I started. I might get back to it for a bit when towards later this month, if I find some catchy idea to work on. Besides that, I do not see any progress on that front. However, the good thing is, I have something beautiful started through the NaNo project this year. Hopefully, through the course of the next few months, I will be able to finish it, and publish it sometime in 2018. I still have a vague goal of publishing a book per year.

That’s about it in this post – I really need to go get ready for office right now.

Until later, enjoy and live your life guilt-free! ❤

Bug Infestation is real!!

We all have seen multiple advertisements of pest control on billboards, TV and other forms of social media. But, I was blissfully unaware of how huge the problem could be until very recently.

I have been seeing cockroaches in the house for the past few months. Last night, I discovered bedbugs in my bed!

It’s like all hell breaking loose. This incident has made it all the more important to maintain cleanliness in the house. Right now, I am reading up about tackling the bugs, but I have a feeling that we need a more regular cadence of cleaning up.

On other note, my new roommate got chicken pox! I was under the impression that chicken pox usually happens in springtime. Apparently, that’s not the case. Since I have not got it before, I am starting to think of ways to prevent it from getting too severe.

Talk about adult life problems! 😦

However, I am trying my best to keep up a cheery mood, because I feel that being sad will in fact increase the chances of falling sick. So, here’s to more smiles!

Until later!

❤

 

When people leave…

Today, my roommate of last two years left the flat.

Two years ago, in Oct. 2015, when I had come to see the room and set up things, one of the first questions I asked her was: So what do you like?

It was my attempt at striking a friendship, to understanding the person who I was going to live with in a city where I had never been to, and knew no one. Many days have passed since then, and as with any other relationship, we have had our fair share of agreements and disagreements.

The beautiful thing about people is, they adapt (or at least they try to/in some cases, pretend to). You put two grown people, from completely different backgrounds and upbringings together, and you see the magic happen. At first, we try to exert ourselves, be the people who we are, without paying too much attention to what the other person brings to the table. There come the disagreements, the fights. But then, when you know the situation is not going to change by itself, you learn to see the other’s point of view. It’s a diffusion process.

Over time, I grew used to her methods and processes. I slowly learnt to appreciate the amount of strength she showed by putting down her papers, finding a new job and a flat, all by herself. That’s what life is all about – people inspire you, and then you do impossible things. Subconsciously, I have taken some decisions which were, in many ways, a result of that diffusion process, and I feel proud that I have been able to take those decisions.

I will miss her, more importantly miss the in-depth conversations we used to have about other people. I like how I tried to understand people and the motivations behind their behavior.

Bangalore has made me immune to a lot of things. It has made me used to people leaving and being able to accept it no matter how hard it is. It has also taught me that the people we live with leave something of themselves in us, and that’s what I will cherish forever.

Here’s to a great future for her. And here’s hoping that I can keep the spirit of her alive in me that was the result of the diffusion process.

 

Getting back on track – Part 2

In the last post, I talked about depression and how I have been recently trying to make some changes in my life to deal with it. I shared the post on Facebook. A lot of people have reached out to me after reading it. Most of them had no clue of what I have been going through and have been very supportive since. Even simple things, like a friend appreciating me for waking up early from seeing my Whatsapp last online status, felt good. I truly appreciate these positive reinforcements .

That said, I have also been actively trying to keep myself busy during the weekends.So far it has worked out great.

Last night, my colleague cum good friend told me about this nice breakfast place they had been to during a team outing, and if I would like to join her this morning. I said yes without thinking too much.

I woke up around 8 AM today, freshened up, did some hasty meditation (still trying to bring in some sort of discipline in it), ate couple of biscuits and a kiwi and got ready to go.

The place is near Hope Farm, which is only a few minutes drive from here. Pooja, my friend was waiting near A2B, Hope Farm junction and we walked together to the cafe.

The place is called The Ant’s Cafe. It’s an oldish house with a big front yard full of trees.  I don’t know so much about architecture, but I liked how the house was built. The place is a little unkempt (lots of fallen leaves), which probably adds to its aura. Besides, there are lot of ants crawling around.

I ordered French toast, peach and caramel smoothie while Pooja ordered omelette, waffle and watermelon juice.

The smoothie was a little too sweet for me, but definitely tasty! Yet, at Rs. 318 for the two things I ordered, I found the cafe a little too expensive for breakfast. But then I hardly eat out and wouldn’t know the running rates for breakfasts at different places.

I was supposed to meet another friend from college in the evening at the mall near my house, but he lives near Ant’s Cafe, so I ended up visiting him in his flat directly. Chatted for about 2 hours and then took a bus back.

I also bought some groceries while coming back, so my refrigerator is full right now with fresh food.

Going out is a experience in itself. Today, especially, I found the roads, the mall and the bus very crowded. Not sure what the occasion was. I travel very less in Bangalore, which is why I almost forgot the toils of travelling in a crowded local bus. But all in all, today was a good day.

Life is changing, and it is changing fast. For the first time, I am making an conscious effort to take care of myself, imbibe good habits. It did take an effort to zone out of the state that I found myself in, but slowly, I am recovering. I am feeling much calm about my life right now.

Will  be back with more updates. Until then, thanks for being part of my journey! A special shout out to all of you who reached out through comments/calls and are cheering me on. Blessed to have you all in my life.

❤

 

Why planning is important

As I mentioned in my last post, at office we are moving to a new timing: 1 PM to 10 PM IST. Like I also mentioned, the change evoked mixed reactions on the floors (much like any other change).

On the supposedly-bright side, meals for three times would be free. And that was what was worrying me the most. Dinner time is from 9.30 PM to 11.00 PM. Given everyone will be done with work at the same time almost, you can only imagine the rush in cafeteria. Last night I went to have dinner at 10.30, most of the food was finished, and the one place where they were still giving food there was such a huge queue that I came back and had a meager meal at home.

It annoys me that we could not plan for this better. Given the change, the logistics should have been planned so much better. Instead of ensuring employees work the scheduled time without fail, what we ended up doing is a mad rush of hungry people who have nothing but the pangs of hunger in mind.

I just don’t know where my life is headed right now. And unless a smart step is taken real soon, I don’t see how this is going to work.

 

If we were having coffee – 1

I haven’t quite blogged in some time now and didn’t know what to talk about as well. So, I decided to do a ‘coffee blog’ where I am gonna tell you things if we were having coffee right now. Here we go:

If we were having coffee, the first thing that I would tell you is I like my coffee better when it is cold – that’s literally the best coffee for me. We get this amazing cold coffee in the office cafeteria for just Rs. 30. Most days when my lunch is too dry, I’ll get myself and my friend Pooja a cup of the chilling, cold coffee.

If we were having coffee, I must tell you about the change in timing that will be implemented starting June 1 in my company. We are moving to the time 1 PM to 10 PM IST. It is supposed to ensure couple of things:

1. Make sure everyone in the team starts and finishes together
2. More overlap with clients

Mu Sigma, until now, was a company where there was no in time or out time. You could literally walk in or leave whenever you wanted. As nice as it sounds, most of the time, people ended up spending many more hours in office than the scheduled 9 hours work. I have known people who literally went to office one day and did not return home until the next day. Hopefully, these new timings should ease things like that out now. There are multiple thoughts and emotions on the floor because of this time change. The fact that it takes away the entire evening time is not something a lot of us are looking forward to. But the fact that we can sleep a little late into the morning and have the mornings to ourselves is definitely cheering us up.

If we were having coffee, I’d definitely tell you about me thinking about switching flats. I might end up getting a single home about 7 km from my workplace by end of July. It’s a nice society and I am looking forward to starting my life all over again over there. Over the last couple of months, my life has sort of become static. I watch TV series on the loop during the weekends. On the weekdays, I am too busy to do anything else. As such, I have moved farther and farther from my goals and passions. I am rarely blogging/writing/reading. I have also been sleeping late and waking up late. I want to press the reset button in my life and bring back some good habits. I am hoping moving to the new flat will make that happen for me.

If we were having coffee, I would tell you that it is really important to have clear, defined goals in life. When I was in school, the goal was to get into a good college. When I went to college, it became about getting into a good workplace. Now that I am working, I do not have any short term or long term goals that I had initially visualized. Now, I am planning to change the same. Eventually, I want to go back to the field of electronics, so I have decided to buy a study table and get started. For now, I am just taking a couple of tests for my promotion at work – at least that is keeping me slightly on schedule.

As the days pass, I am also starting to having thoughts around settling down – marriage. As I have often talked about earlier, I had student loans and I do not plan to get married until and unless I have paid it off and made some savings. It’s becoming increasingly lonely to live among strangers and having no goal in life. Maybe, I’d be healthier if I were around people who would hold me accountable and who I’d be responsible for. Let’s see.

If you were having coffee with me right now, what would you tell me? What’s new in your life?

Until our next coffee date!

❤

 

This day last/this/next year

This day last year I boarded the train to Bangalore from Kolkata. Hours before we were to board the train, as we waited in the busy sidewalk of Dharmatala SBSTC bus stand, a fateful phone call informed us of my maternal grandfather’s demise. Minutes before that phone call, my brother and I were struggling to use our first free Ola ride.

That phone call changed things. My mother became fatherless. The first step towards my professional life was forever marked by a black day in the family. The instant thought that came to my mind was this: “What next?” Would we cancel going to Bangalore and head to my maternal uncle’s place? For a few selfish seconds, I wished we did not have to cancel going to Bangalore (even though I dreaded every moment of the forward journey), not thinking what it meant for my mother. The tickets to Bangalore were booked for me, my mother and father. My brother was to see us off to Howrah station and leave.

My mother solved our dilemma. Being the clear-thinking woman that she is, she prioritized her daughter’s future over her dead father. I think aside from giving birth to me, that was the greatest gift she ever gave to me.

October 4th, 2015 ushered in a lot of changes in my life. The next 33 odd hours in the train would put a lot of distance between my home and the life there to what lay ahead.

Days before that fateful train journey, as I prepared for life in Bangalore, I thought to myself, “How many days before life again becomes normal?” Even though I was about to move to a different state, different town, different culture, I knew in the end the novelty of the shift would rub off and life would be the everyday life again, as I would get used to the newness of it all. Bengal or Bangalore does not really matter as long as you go to sleep in a comfortable bed with a full stomach.

Lately, I have wanted to tear myself away from the mundane sameness of everyday life here in Bangalore. But today, I want to appreciate the things I have achieved since October 4th, 2015. I am grateful that I am healthy, that I had a good dinner, that I have a brand new day to look forward to. I am glad for the people around me, my parents, especially my mother, who keeps calling me at every opportunity she gets – which really goes a long way in removing homesickness. I am grateful for the good walk through ITPL to reach my office. I am grateful for the busy-ness that life at Mu Sigma has given me. Today, as I climbed down from the tenth to eighth floor in the morning, I could not but marvel looking at the sheer rapidity with which people were moving from one floor to another, swiping their IDs, getting to their work desk, ready to solve problems. I am grateful I am alive to see such movement. As long as their is motion, there is life.

Today, I  bought a pressure cooker off the money I had received courtesy the spot award in my previous project. Felt so good! This was the first kitchen purchase with my own money.

As I write this, I cannot but wonder, what will 4th October, 2017 show me? Will I be sitting in the same room as I am now, typing another blog post? Will I still have the people I love around me? Will I have been able to buy something really nice for my mother, my first true gift to her since I started working? As I dream of the things that I want to achieve, I can hear my mother saying not to let my dreams run loose – for they may never come true if I put them in words. As per her, there is probably someone who is listening on our dreams, ready to stop whatever we dream from happening the moment we dream it through. Having fed such thoughts since childhood, my heart hesitates.

Yet the mind wanders…

 

Morphing into a child at Cubbon Park, Bangalore

From this month, I am adding a Travel section to this blog. I have often spoken about my love about travel, but rarely blogged about my travel adventures here. For now, I plan to publish at least one travel post per month. This month I bring you all the greenery and freshness of Cubbon Park, Bangalore.

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Date: 02.06.2016

Place: Office Cafeteria

My colleague-cum-friend, and a wonderful travel partner by now, Pooja, asks me if I want to go to Cubbon Park this weekend. I don’t even think before saying yes. I don’t even know where Cubbon Park is, what is special there. I just say yes, because it’s been a long time since I went somewhere.

So on fourth of June, Saturday, Pooja and I reach Cubbon Park around 2.30 PM. We both are hungry and bubbling with energy. The first thing I observe are the tall trees flanking the roads, and people in black-and-white dresses coming out of a office. Lawyers. “Is there a court here?” I ask Pooja. “Yes,” she replies. I exclaim what a wonderful place it is to work, surrounded by greenery.

There are benches under the trees. We go sit in one. We have brought lunch with us. I made aloo parathes, which unfortunately, got cold. Pooja made some really spicy pasta. Few feet away from us, a family of pigeons and squirrels are also having their lunch. Squirrels are my favourite! I feel privileged to sit by their side and eat my lunch. It is  perhaps the most natural lunch that I ate in my life.

Lunch beside squirrels (though I don’t think they are much visible in this)

After we finish eating, we venture out. “There’s an aquarium somewhere nearby,” Pooja says. “Sure, let’s check it out.”

On the way to the aquarium, we see the wonderful statues they have made from tree trunks.

A tree-house?

The entry fee at in the Goverment Aquarium is a mere five rupees. I am surprised by the fact that you can get to see something for so cheap in Bangalore. There is a good collection of fish in there, in two separate stories. The room is dimly lit, except the fish tanks. It is a psychedelic experience. We meet the parrot fish, whose pouts Pooja admires. We learn that parrot fish, once tamed, will eat food from our hands. We also see snake-head fish, whose heads really do resemble snakes. Some fish are restless, moving across the tank in second’s time. Some are patient and float slowly, especially the lone long-nosed fish.

Parrot Fish at the Aquarium, Cubbon Park

After the aquarium, it is time for the Children’s park. Pooja wants to get on some rides. As a child, I haven’t ridden much. I am the more viewer type. Plus, my mother didn’t appreciate spending bucks on some thrill that lasts few minutes. But today is different. I want to try out something new, with Pooja. Her enthusiasm is catchy. She asks if I will be scared. I say, “Not at all.”

It is not really fear that I am feeling as I sit on the boat-shaped swing, though I watch from time to time at the mechanical joints. What happens if the hinge breaks? Slowly, the boat is filled with little children and a few adults. After some time, it swings into motion. High and high we go, and then whoosh, we come down. I know I hate this coming-down feeling. My stomach feels empty. The air is filled with the screams of the little children. They scream as the boat rises, they scream as the boat comes down. They are giggling, but they are screaming. I am suddenly transported to my childhood days when all my classmates would shout wildly in the few minutes the teachers left us alone. The smile on my face grows wider and wider.

Image Courtesy

After the swinging, it is time to do some break-dance. It is Pooja’s favourite ride. For the next few moments, I discover what it must feel like to be a piece of cloth in the washing machine, or an onion in the mixer grinder. The accelerations are sharp and erratic. I am hurled into Pooja and vice versa. We laugh non-stop.

By the time I jump down the break-dance, I am bubbling with energy. I hardly feel that we have walked for so long. My childhood is back with me.

After the rides, we roam some more. We take a few pictures. We see Karnataka High Court. I pose beside the lion in front of the High Court gate, determined to look ferocious. I hardly manage to stop smiling.

Who’s the scary one?

After this we see some more wood carvings. I take a panorama picture in front of the Library housed inside Cubbon Park. After two hours of breathing in the freshest air, we leave the Park.

Jpeg

Jpeg

Visiting the Cubbon Park was one of the most exhilarating experience I had since coming to Bangalore. I live near Whitefield, which is hardly as beautiful and decorated as MG Road. It was refreshing to see that part of Bangalore.

If you are travelling from Kadugodi/Hope Farm/ITPL, you can take 335E bus which will directly take you to Corporation. Cubbon Park is a few minutes walk from there. If you do go there, do not forget to also visit the Vidhana Soudha, which is the legislative building of Karnataka. It is a majestic building, imposing in its own right. There are small eateries selling popcorn, corns, juices in many places inside the park in case  you’re hungry.

If you have a kid, Cubbon Park is one of the must-visit places for you.